I have been lucky enough to be working for a Montessori elementary school here in Madison! I work there two or three times a month either in the classroom or watching the kids if the parents and teachers have a meeting.
I am so lucky to be in this school. I have made some excellent connections within the community.
I also find that with each and every one of my experiences at the school, whether I am in the classroom or watching the children in more of a daycare situation, my passion is renewed. I leave breathlessly excited about what I am doing. The parents are so respectful of their children and the children are so excited and ready to learn. In this past year that I have worked there, I have seen children as young as three walk over to the shelf where all the arts and crafts are, take out all of their materials, use the scissors to cut out their desired shapes, color them, then put all of the things away on their own. Without anyone saying a thing. I have seen four year olds tell me about every continent in the world. I have seen six year olds mulitply. All doing these things because of the environment that is provided to them and the guidance they receive from their teacher. They do these things because they want to. They do these things because they have wings and are given a chance. It is absolutely amazing what children are capable of when they are given these chances to explore.
It is something I want to devote my life to. And I am so lucky to be a part of something that thrills me everytime I am a part of it.
I dig being a Mom. I also dig being a teacher. Therefore I dig teaching my son.
It is so thrilling to see him get into what we're doing. We often tie playing and learning together so when we are playing blocks I say, "I love the two squares that you've put together. That makes a rectangle" or we play a game like lacing cards or memory with word cards.
I am also a huge nerd when it comes to this stuff. It thrills me to organize little learning exercises for him, to make sure he's learning with everything we do, and to execute it.
I recently found the websites Preschool Express and Letter of the Week. With these, I have arranged a weekly theme, letter, number, shape, color, stories, a field trip, special food, crafts, and games.
For example, this week we learned the letter B. With Montessori you learn the sound of the letter before you learn what the letter is. I tie these two together. We write the letter B down, trace it with our fingers, and say "The letter B goes down, then you make a small BUMP and a BIG BUMP. The letter B says Buh buh for Bubble, Boy, Bee, Bear, Ball," etc. Liam usually repeats it depending on how into it he is. But it's good to see him repeating "Down, Bump, Bump" later in the day as he recognizes other B's. Along with this, we work on his letters. L. I. A. M. We find these letters when we read books and he connects them with a special pride. "Iam's letters," he says.
Letter from last week -
Along with the theme, we go to the library and get books on the subject. Last week it was kittens, so we got books with real pictures of cats and kittens, how they grow, what they eat, etc. We went to the local pet store and watched the tiny kittens play and he was so excited to see what he had learned in action. He kept talking about how Buckley, our cat, was a kitten and now he's a "big cat".
This week the shape is circle and the color is blue. We will make blueberry pie and tarts to emphasize these two.
Nerdtastic. I know it. I get it. I wear my nerdiness with honor.
"A few times in my life I've had moments of absolute clarity, when for a few brief seconds the silence drowns out the noise and I can feel rather than think, and things seem so sharp and the world seems so fresh. I can never make these moments last. I cling to them, but like everything, they fade. I have lived my life on these moments. They pull me back to the present, and I realize that everything is exactly the way it was meant to be."
"The importance of parents giving full attention to their children when possible, not for the purpose of entertaining them but to establish a collaboration with children in their development, is also stressed. The energy of the child under three years is such that parents usually find time together a challenge.
The following incident illustrates this point. A mother of a twenty-one-month-old boy said to me recently, 'it's just incredible how much time he takes. It's so hard to get anything done but take care of him. I want to be there for him but it is so frustrating when there are so many things that I want to accomplish.' Then she told me that earlier that day she had been in the yard with her son. He had begun to climb a five-foot open-rung ladder that was leaning against a tree. After he got to the top, it was extremely hard for him to get down. At first, he tried to turn around and face outward, so that he could see where he was going. He kept trying to figure out how to turn around, how to look forward while going down backward. He worked at this for a long time. Finally, he gave up trying to turn around and began to descend while going down backward, clutching, with his chubby hands, the ladder rung, dropping one foot down then feeling for the next rung below. Eventually, when he found it, he started feeling for the next rung. He was totally absorbed in his activity, concentrating every muscle. Sometimes he missed a rung and hung there, feeling about with his foot. His mother remained next to him, holding her arms out to 'spot' him. Each time that he missed, she resisted the temptation to place his foot on the rung. It was hard not to help, but he was so pelased with himself when he managed on his own and gave no indication of wanting help. All the while that he was engaged in this concentrated effot, he was repeating to himself, 'Don't fall, don't fall,' 'Be careful, be careful,' 'Climb down, climb down.' When he made it to the bottom after such laborious effort, he said, 'Do it again!' and up he went. This process continued for an hour and a hald. Then he stopped as suddenly as he had begun. Some inner need was met. He was calm and happy and ready to go inside for his lunch."
Too often parents restrict their children in their exploration. "They are too young," I hear often at the playground. "They don't know how to hold a cup...they can't get into that chair...they are too small for that big slide..."
When you don't give them the chance to explore it, to figure out their own boundaries, they never will. They don't know. They can't.
Our children are not too small unless we perceive them as small.
I've gotten a lot of questions about the choice to switch to a big boy bed so early.
For instance:
Q: "Why would you do that? I want to keep so and so in their bed until they're five!"
A: I feel that this switch is an important one for many reasons. This is a switch that is best done earlier one. Like weaning off the bottle, you want to do it before they become attached.
I believe in Montessori philosophy. For those of you that know me well, you know this is a Pandora's box that, once opened, is hard to close. I could seriously talk for hours on the beauty of Montessori education, but that is for another post, my friends.
In Montessori education, the most important thing to keep in mind when working with children is that you always teach the child a way so that they can become more independent and less dependent, more confident in their own actions, more trusting in their own world. In each step, you think to yourself, "Am I doing something in this action that my child could be doing for themselves? Am I taking a step (or learning process) away from them?" By giving them this freedom, you are giving them wings. You are granting them the power to learn and proceed as they wish in the world.
A very important thing in this philosophy is providing the best learning environment for them. This means providing small tables and chairs so that they can climb into them easily, storing toys and materials at their level so they can reach it as they wish, keeping stools around the house so they can stand higher and reach the sink to wash their hands by themselves. It's looking at the world around you and thinking about how they can access it. Adults often say that children can't do certain things. Or they underestimate them - if you leave the stool in the bathroom, they will make a mess. Or worse, they will do it wrong. This attitude effects children. Think about it, if you had to ask someone to get something for you every time you wanted it, wouldn't you feel defeated like you couldn't do it? If they make a mess, teach them to clean it up. Guide them to do it right. Give them wings.
(See what I mean, Pandora's box.)
In the child's bedroom, it is essential that you provide this environment for them. Here's where the bed on the floor comes in. You create a safe place for them, where the whole room is a secured and childproofed area. Consider it a big playpen. You put the bed on the floor and it allows him to get up and move freely as he wants to. He may wake up at three in the morning, he may play for a little bit, and he may fall asleep on the floor. I am okay with this. (It is spring here and okay to go without blankets) I know that if he wakes up, he will learn quickly that the bed is more comfortable and that he will find his way back to it. I know that he is in a safe place. I know that by giving him the freedom of his movements, he will gain trust in his own actions and he will possibly learn faster.
This environment also comes into play when designing the child's room. Many nurseries and child's room these days reflect the taste of the parents. Even if the parent is thinking of the child when purchasing Winnie the Pooh wall decals, it usually serves as a distraction to the young child's sleeping needs. It's important to keep the room simple, quiet, and peaceful. A chair for rocking, a mattress, a small shelf with a few board books, and a mobile is all the child really needs in the room. (And not even all of that.) When decorating the room, think about what the baby could be doing when they wake up. If the room is filled with toys, especially loud toys, they will wake up and be stimulated with loud music and have trouble getting back to sleep. If there are pictures on the wall, hang them low to the ground and secure them well so the small toddler can see them and get to know the pictures. Rotate the pictures occasionally so that they can learn more. If there are shelves, have them low. If there is a lamp, don't make it a floor lamp or you're asking for trouble. Think about the child. Think about their needs. By giving them the bed on the floor, you are allowing them the freedom to learn faster. The freedom to learn at their own pace.
And that is why I love Montessori. It gives kids wings. It gives them the freedom to learn and to grow.
I received a lot of faces when saying that I was going to make the switch so young. Most were respectful, wondering why. But I got some of the "Mom faces" where the forehead scrunches down, eyebrows up, and mouth in a scrunched up disapproval. This is usually followed by the question asked above. I don't want to get into my long answer above, so I just say that Liam is a climber (which is true) and that we don't want him falling (which is also true). It's hard to explain something that is different without sounding condescending, without making them feel small. I don't feel like I am right all the time. I don't feel like I have all the answers. I sure as hell know I don't in fact. And I sure as hell don't know what is best for their family or their child. There is so much crap and so much guilt that comes from being a parent. We are always disagreeing with each other, looking down at each others decisions. It is so hard being a parent, and there are so many pressures and things to worry about. Is little Sarah teething or does she have an ear infection again? Should we do antibiotics? Should we do herbal remedies? Does she need tubes? What about those pedophiles? Last time I check we didn't have any too close to our neighborhood, but I should really check again? And where are my damn keys? My personal problems are finding that balance between guiding Liam and intruding on his learning, letting him learn from his own actions and letting him go too far, and choosing my battles and staying consistent on them.
My point is, we all have our issues. We all have our guilt and our pressures. We all understand this. You are not wrong and I am not wrong. We are all doing our best and we will all make mistakes. And if we don't put our kids in therapy for the thing we are doing to them now, we will put them in therapy for the things we do later. My point is, that we all love our children and that is the most important thing.
So the next time I receive the Mom face or get advice that I did not ask for and do not welcome, I will smile and nod. I will know that that person is doing their best and means well. And I will know that we will all be fine, toddler bed, crib, or mattress on the floor.
I've been so bad again. What, has it been three, four weeks? Ah well.
It has been an interesting time. First, let's talk the fun stuff -
Play doh!
Yes, it sticks to your fingers
AAANNND your chin, but only if you suck on it first.
It has been beautiful lately and we found a park that we absolutely love. If you think it's hard going to the park with one toddler, try three. It's mental suicide. Anxiety ridden toddler craziness.
But here, at this park, there are duck ducks that swim in wawa. There are slides, double swings (check that out!),
and a big field for kicking balls or running around. Plus, it's about a mile away, so Mommy works off the three cupcakes she had for breakfast.
This month we're really taken a turn for the super dangerous. I struggle with the battles that I choose. For instance, do I let him jump on the cushions on the floor? Yes. Do I let him jump on the chair and couch? I'm not sure. Do I let him hurl head first off the chair? Preferably no. Does it matter what I think? Not at all, because right after I shot this angelic picture of my boy, he did just that.
Here we are at one of the aforementioned parks, where I have heart attacks.
Liam absolutely SHRIEKS with joy when he is excited by something now. Here it is in action. I love the arms back and belly out to exclaim even louder.
Dangerous item at the park. I love guiding Liam on this one when it's just the two of us at the park. He is very good at figuring out how to move his arms and legs at the same time. I love it when he climbs up it, because when he is on the other side, looking down at it and thinking about hurling himself head first off of it, he has a recollection of it. You go up, not down. So far, so good. No hurling yet. (FINGERS CROSSED!)
Chalk is super crazy fun. So is eating it like it's a french fry.
Liam is still learning how to run. It's so cute watching him figure it out. He gets this fast, crazy awkward walk where his legs swing around.
We've been walking to a toddler gym on Tuesdays. It is a big gym with tubes, tricycles, mats, balls, and lots of kids running around. It's practically free and one of the many reasons why Madison is such a great place for kids. Here we are walking to the gym, and Liam and his little friend Sadie held hands the whole half an hour.
They have developed such a special relationship. They often play hide and go seek and chase all day. When we read stories on the couch together, they lay on each other and giggle. When I see their friendship, I feel so happy that I made this decision to have this daycare in our home. Yes, it's a "job". But it's a job where I can stay home with my boy and see all of his moments. It's a job where he can socialize, build friendships, and learn to share not one, but all of his toys. It's a job where I can be sure that he is eating well, learning well, and having fun. It's a job where I get paid, where I don't have three car seats so it's a little isolating sometimes, but I love it. I truly love it.
After nap one day, John gave Liam his ipod and headphone.
Get this boy some tables, and he's ready to dj.
Rock it, little man, rock it.
Here we are getting pancakes. Mmmm maple syrup. I think Liam would have eaten that tiger if we had covered it in enough syrup. Maybe he would have even eaten vegetables.
Again, one of the super MONSTER scary playgrounds that we tried out. This one is really special, with a deck out to the lake, a street with fast cars, and playground equipment that's fifteen feet tall.
But here we are looking cute -
Check out that super curl.
Liam loves to kiss the "baby".
SOOOO FUNNN!
He actually says "weeee". It just kills me.
We got a new chalkboard from Ikea. Love Ikea. Here we can experiment with eating chalk like french fries indoors instead of out. This is also fun because we can decorate Daddy's pants with lines of pink chalk right before he leaves to teach. That's okay Liam, there were already ketchup stains on it. ;)
For the past few months, we've had a little playgroup with some friends. I don't even know why we bring out the bowls with this group. We should probably just throw the bag of crackers to them and see what happens.
And our biggest achievement of the month -
BIG BOY BED!
Inspired by the Montessori philosophy, I bought a twin mattress and put it right on the floor. It's okay if he gets up from his bed because I stripped his room to make it more like a big, safe playpen. The only things in the room now are his mattress, the bottom half of his dresser (it was a two piece antique hutch), and a few books. There are a few pajamas in his dresser and a cd player on top where we play bedtime music. I will add a small table and a few more books as time goes on, but I didn't want to distract him too much in the beginning. We transitioned Liam to bigger blankets and a regular pillow a few months ago and he did very well with it.
I put the bed in and the first day we just talked about it. We were very careful to be calm and quiet on the bed. This is not a place for jumping or being wild (that will come in the weeks, months, years to come, I know), but it's a place for reading, cuddling, and sleeping. Here we are getting used to it. The first day Liam and I cuddled and read books on the new bed. We pretended to sleep on it and put his monkeys to sleep. They all wake with a big GOOOD MOOOORNING!!!! and we put our arms in the air!
Despite this solid beginning, I was still a little nervous.
And then the first nap...
SUCCESS!
I spent the first forty five minutes of that nap sitting outside his door, reading a book and listening to him. He talked to his monkeys for a few minutes and got really quiet. When all was still for a very long time, I saw him. Crashed.
After that nap I thought that he would need more transition. I thought we would nap in the bed for a few days, sleep in the crib at night and then make the full transition. However, later that night I ran a few errands and came home later than expected. John really wanted to help and put Liam to bed... in his crib. With no transition. With no help. I was stunned for a minute, like, why did you DO that? He NEEDS this?!?! But Liam was asleep. He did it. And he has done it every nap and every bedtime since. No problems, no transitions, no big deal.
He did figure out that the pillow and covers are more comfortable. He prefers those to the middle of the bed now.
To close, here Liam is after a big blackberry snack in his stroller. Silly Mommy thought it would be a good idea to give the babies blackberries in a ziploc bag before going to the park. Silly Mommy. I didn't think that the berries (be-yees) would be so much FUN to SQUISH in the bag and THEN eat. But, good job on getting the eyebrow too, bud. Nice swipe. :)
These are points to consider when presenting activities to infants. I found these points online and thought I should share. It is so easy to forget (especially when you are watching three under a year a half!) that infants are people. People that you can speak to as ...well, people. It is so important to guide the child, be present in their learning, but not intrusive, provide the right environment, and then let them take off. Your actions will give them wings to self-development, self-learning, and confidence.
Enjoy!
-Keeping the infants sensitive periods in mind, prepare materials and keep them nearby, available for a time when the infant is ready.
-To help accustom infants to the idea of work space. Present activities on a work mat placed on the floor. As much as possible, especially when several materials are involved, use a tray, basket, or other container to carry the materials to the work mat. Remove the materials from the container, move the container aside, and work with the materials on the work mat.
-Choose materials that you know will interest the child and appeal to the childs senses
-Present materials that are unfamiliar to the child as often as you present familiar materials
-Present an activity when the infant is alert, comfortable, and rested. Do not use an activity to distract an infant who is tired or hungry
-Make sure you have the infants attention before you start to present the activity. For example, wait until the infant focuses on your face or smiles at you.
-While presenting, move very slowly and make sure that the infant can see what you are doing
-Place the activity where the infant can reach it easily, even if he/she cannot sit unaided.
-Until the infants vision develops, hold objects at the infants eye level.
-If the infant tries to grab an object you are presenting, allow the infant to do so for as long as he/she wants. When the infant returns the object, continue with the activity or present it at another time.
-If the infant becomes frustrated or irritable, calmly finish the activity and take the infant with you to return the materials.
-Once the infant starts focusing on the activity, remain nearly where the infant can see you. Young infants especially may need your presence as an emotional anchor to develop confidence in this new situation.
-Stay attentive to the infants safety. Remember that infants explore with their mouths as well as their hands.
-As long as the infant is not in danger, allow the infant to explore freely. The Montessori approach gives the infant freedom to choose, explore and learn. The caregiver does not correct how the infant holds an object, does not intervene or interrupt unless absolutely necessary, and does not let other children interfere. The goal is to let the infant explore for as long as his/her focus lasts.
-Stay aware of the normal infant growth and development. Many Montessori centers post a growth and development chart where staff can refer to it quickly and easily.
